Minute With Mallon: Don’t Hit Send!
Welcome to Minute with Mallon!
Something I Taught:
A leader I was working with recently got an email that made her angry. Really angry.
One of her employees had made a decision without talking to her first, and from where she sat, it looked careless and irresponsible. Her first instinct was to fire back an email.
So she typed it.
It was direct. It was strong. And she was absolutely convinced she was right.
But for some reason, she didn't hit Send.
Instead, she got up, walked away from her computer, and decided she would deal with it a little later.
A couple of hours later, she learned something she didn't know.
The employee hadn't been careless at all. A customer had an emergency, she couldn't be reached, and waiting would have cost the company a significant amount of money.
The employee had actually made a great decision.
Think about that for a minute.
Two hours earlier, this leader was ready to correct someone who actually deserved to be congratulated.
Leadership Lives in the Pause.
Over the years, I've seen a lot of leadership mistakes happen, not because someone was a bad leader, but because they responded too quickly.
An email comes in. Someone says something we don't like. An employee makes a mistake. Our spouse frustrates us. (Never you Sandy! ❤️)
And immediately, we react.
Great leaders learn to create a little space between what happens and what they do next.
Sometimes that space is 10 seconds. Sometimes it's 10 minutes. Sometimes it's overnight.
That pause gives you time to ask yourself:
What don't I know yet?
Am I responding to the facts, or am I responding to my emotions?
What response will I be proud of tomorrow?
I don't think you'll regret very many times when you paused before responding.
But you'll probably regret quite a few times when you didn't.
So here's my challenge for you this week:
When something triggers you, don't immediately react.
Pause. Get curious. Then respond.
That little space may be where some of your best leadership happens.
Something to Ponder:
Anybody can make the simple complicated. Creativity is making the complicated simple.
Charles Mingus
Something I Learned:
I'm reading a book called Asking Better Questions by J.R. Briggs. A treasured friend of mine named Jonathan Vinke who also happens to be one of my most intelligent friend, recommended it. Awesome book!
Here's an excerpt that grabbed my attention:
In every crowd there are Diminishers and there are Illuminators. Diminishers make people feel small and unseen. They see other people as things to be used, not as persons to be befriended. They stereotype and ignore. They are so involved with themselves that other people are just not on their radar screen. Illuminators, on the other hand, have a persistent curiosity about other people. They have been trained or have trained themselves in the craft of understanding others. They know what to look for and how to ask the right questions at the right time. They shine the brightness of their care on people and make them feel bigger, deeper, respected, lit up.
That really made me stop and think.
When people walk away from a conversation with me, do they feel bigger or smaller? Do they feel genuinely seen and heard?
I love that word Illuminator.
Illuminators don't need all the answers. They're simply curious about the person in front of them, and they ask good questions.
Here's something to think about this week:
When people spend time with you, do they leave feeling diminished...or illuminated?
Be someone who lights people up.💡
Something I Saw:
It’s coming!
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Hope you have an incredible week!
Robert
